...for Chuck

Dear God...
I hurt. This time I dont hurt for me and my life...I hurt for Chuck. A client of a client whose wife of 57 years passed away last week...and I spoke with him this morning. He called regarding a letter that he receied addressed to the both of them. He asked..."what does it mean?" In hindsight I can see that Marie is not gone...they are forever one. What a poetic answer...however at the time all I had to offer was my ear. I listened while he spoke. He told me that he missed her something sore...and he did not like that she was no longer here. She suffered, but her leaving only offered small comfort. Because he misses her. He told me he didnt know if he was coming or going sometimes. He told me about his doctors appointment and how everything came back wonderfully. No diabets, no high blood pressure, no disorders whatsover...in this world and for him to be in his 80's that is DAMN good! He says that his Marie is making sure that he is well. I agree. 57 years...is how long they have been together...and in my ignorance I once said that I couldnt imagine being with anyone that long...but to hear the love that fills his heart for her...forced me to be honest. His greatest pain reflects lifes greatest joy. A life of love. A life where you loved and got love in return. He asked a favor of me...could I call him from time to time...and just ask him how he was. I got so choked up...I would be honored. He kept apologizing for talking to me...I was at a loss. His pain was so raw and so real...I felt it over the phone. I still carry it in my chest right now...hoping that if I carry some that it will somehow lighten his load. He told me he was so lonely. I know the feeling. Not his circumstance...but lonely and I go WAAy BACK. I want to be there for him. It moved me how honest he is...and how he is willing to ask for what he needs from the deepest part of him. It is a quality that I have yet to master. It is very admirable. I love him. I will make it a point to connect with him every day. I thought it might be nice to visit him from time to time...even tho thats what he pays our client for. I figure that he could use someone that is willing to be there because they are compelled to be and not cuz they get paid to be . I dont get it...a few months ago...one of my biggest complaints was that I couldnt "feel" anything...now I seem to feel EVERY thing. I am thankful...I am alive. I am thankful...for the ways that I am used. God you are the greatest! Please stay close to Chuck during this time. Help him to keep the love that he has in his heart living eternal. Amen.