16 October, 2007

A coca cola bottle or a 2 liter

Well...time is winding down. I dont know how far along I am because there are so many rumors going around. My doctor is saying one thing, the ultrasound said another...yet my tummy and womans intuition is saying yet another. At my last appointment I measured 33 weeks! So I could be like 35 weeks right now! The thought of that is INCREDIBLE! I am excited and scared. One thing lately that has been on my mind (besides the fact that I need the terms of my relationship clearly defined...AGAIN! Sigh!) is that I need to really get my mind back on track. Because I could easily start to look like what I consider 'mama's' to look like. And if you are a mama...please dont be offended...I mean that tired overweight woman who just let herself go! That thought scared the Be-Jesus out of me! I know shallow but...I AM having back to back pregnancies...and I did gain a substantial amount of weight. I keep thinking...I should have eaten better...or worked out more...but at this point in the game...SHOULDA, COULDA, WOULDA...What is...IS! I am meaty! I mean, IMO, my body looks great! Its doin the damn thing!...however..once my baby is no longer inside me...then I will just be fat! And that is not something that I want for myself or my family. I know that it will take time...but I feel overwhelmed already...cuz see...I need to lose like 85-90 lbs. I had struggled with losing 30 lbs...and now I am going to attempt to lose TRIPLE THAT??? With two children under the age of 2??? Who do I think I am ?? I'm scared. I dont want to be round shaped...I really dont. Luckily I still [barely] have a nice silhouette...but I am literally...a small fry away from being an oblong oval shape! Does anyone know any programs that work well? My bosses wife recommended Weight Watchers...but I am not sure how much money I will have for all that? I want to look better than I EVER HAVE!!! My first pregnancy I gained weight mostly in my tummy...this time...it is EVERYWHERE! I am trying to focus on the matter at hand...but the matter on my thighs and face and back...are BEGGING for my attention as well. :)

9 comments:

Lisa Steptoe said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lisa Steptoe said...

Girl, I can honestly say that I've been where you have been and struggled and finally after losing most of it, I bought the rest. Weight Watchers worked best for me for the most part, but if you don't have the money for the meetings...I hear ya. I'll be glad to send you my books, etc and you could do the program on your own but I KNOW that will require dedication. Drop me a line and I'll send it to ya.

Sweet KeiKei said...

girl i know how you feel but you know what i try to do? just take it one day at a time and each time i eat or go to lay down instead of cleaning up or going for a walk, i'll think about it first and say to myself if there is something better i could be eating or doing. and each small step i take adds up to the bigger step of losing the wright little by little. good luck!!! i'm sure you'll be fine!!!
xoxo

jali said...

Remember how quickly breast feeding pulls you back into shape? That'll be a good start. Then, as u.d. said, one day at a time.
Last - remember you're beautiful and you're loved.

Shai said...

I agree with UD. Plus, girl you don't know how much weight will drop after the birth. Plus, running after 2 kids can burn off the weight.

Nic said...

Hey girlie!! I don't know of any really good weight loss programs right now, but I will definately keep my ears open.

1 thing though...I heard that breast feeding helps a lot to get the stomache down. I don't know why or how, but I've seen it help with a few friends.

2. I would think that running around with 2 kids might help the burn.

Just don't try that Alli stuff. I've heard terrible stories.

Peace

*Tanyetta* said...

check your email. i don't want to put a dang on essay in your comments :)

*Tanyetta* said...

Yeah, don't try Alli. I heard it's about $60 and it just goes down the toilet. literally! LOL

*Tanyetta* said...

change your mindset.

NO diets! they are a short term remedy!

i will email you the details on what i've done.

i'm down from 209 to 150 in less than a year! NO DIETS!!!!!!!! trust. i'm too broke to buy pills and crap like that so, i will email you what worked for me.

hugs!!!!!!! and dont' be so hard on yourself. :)